Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Ultimate springtime golf fitness tips for "real" golfers
National Golf Editor
For those of you unfortunate enough to live in the North, you must be salivating at the thought of the spring golf season.
Hold on, Tiger. You ain't the man you used to be. You can't just jump up and go straight to the golf course after a long winter of sloth and mold.
Now, you will find any number of charlatans willing to sell you their total golf fitness regimens. These sleazoids always assume you're a golfer interested in a cleaner, healthier way of living and golfing. I've seen you out on the course, and I know that's not the sort of thing you're "into."
So here is my total golf fitness regimen for the "real" golfer:
• For God's sake, you have to strengthen your core! This involves eating really hard food, like jawbreakers. Eat a bag of those and have your neighbor punch you in the gut to see if your core is all it can be.
Options: Month-old fudge, Purina Dog Chow, pine bark.
• You also have to really work your obliques, I mean really work the hell out of them. Here's the perfect exercise for that. Lie flat on your back with knees bent slightly wider than your hips. If you have really fat hips, you're either going to have to really stretch your knees like in a cartoon, like The Elastic Man from India, or just skip this exercise. In fact, if you have really fat hips, just skip playing golf, nobody wants to see you out on the course.
Now, you slim-hipped people reach your hands to the ceiling like you're crying out for the Lord Jesus Christ to spare you from your miserable existence. You can hold light hand-weights, or not. What do I care? Lift your head and chest toward the ceiling and rotate to reach both hands just outside of your fat, right knee. Repeat on the left side. Now, take a breather. Ask Christ for forgiveness.
• Breathing exercises: Breathing properly and deeply is critical, especially for those tense moments on the course when normally you would start crying.
This deep-breathing exercise involves attending your local adult movie house, or calling up one of those sites on your Internet browser. Follow your instincts. It's either that or follow mine, and then you're looking at jail time.
• Horizontal abduction/adduction: I can't give you much help here, because I always get "horizontal" confused with "vertical," and I have no idea what adduction is. Who came up with that word, anyway? It's a stupid word and should be eliminated from the English language, if it's even English.
• Standing hip rotation: Don't do this. It makes you look like a girl.
• Alcohol fitness: How many times have you lost $2 Nassaus because while you were getting hamboned, your playing partners were just holding up that bottle of Jack Black pretending to drink?
Well, no need to waste good liquor. You can still drink and maintain your competitive edge. You just need to build up a tolerance. Stand upright in a dark closet, with a wide stance, and suck it down. Keep drinking until your wife leaves you.
• Aerobics: Ha! Don't make me laugh. This is golf!
• Putting: Don't bother to practice putting. Putting in golf is overrated. I play golf maybe 200 times a year and I've yet to meet anyone who can putt. You either make it or you don't. If you miss, just keep putting until the ball goes in the hole. Simple.
• Seniors: As we age, our bodies react differently, so seniors must prepare for golf differently than young punks. An important thing to remember is that there is an inverse relationship of increased ear hair to laughably short drives off the tee.
So keep those ear hairs trim and neat. If you're proud of your thick mane of ear hair, don't sweat it. If you're short off the tee, you're probably small in other areas, and I think you know what I'm talking about.
• Excuses: A healthy psychological outlook is a must for Better Golf. If you can convince yourself that the snap hook you hit into the weeds over there is not your doing at all, you'll retain the confidence needed to excel in the game.
The first time you smack one of your all-too-typical lousy shots, turn to your playing partner and snarl," "Will you stop that!" Look at him, looking all hurt and everything. Who would have thought golf fitness could be so much fun?
• Torque development in the downswing: This is so important, I can barely contain myself. This is vital to any golfer who has ever wanted to improve his score. You could even say it is absolutely critical in terms of reaching your full potential as a golfer and knowing what it is to be truly human.
• Alignment and posture: Face the target squarely and stand erect, with your rump jutting out slightly. Feels a little silly, doesn't it? Can you think of another situation in life where you would position yourself in such an odd manner? I can't.
Monday, April 28, 2008
Ultimate springtime golf fitness tips for "real" golfers
National Golf Editor
For those of you unfortunate enough to live in the North, you must be salivating at the thought of the spring golf season.
Hold on, Tiger. You ain't the man you used to be. You can't just jump up and go straight to the golf course after a long winter of sloth and mold.
Now, you will find any number of charlatans willing to sell you their total golf fitness regimens. These sleazoids always assume you're a golfer interested in a cleaner, healthier way of living and golfing. I've seen you out on the course, and I know that's not the sort of thing you're "into."
So here is my total golf fitness regimen for the "real" golfer:
• For God's sake, you have to strengthen your core! This involves eating really hard food, like jawbreakers. Eat a bag of those and have your neighbor punch you in the gut to see if your core is all it can be.
Options: Month-old fudge, Purina Dog Chow, pine bark.
• You also have to really work your obliques, I mean really work the hell out of them. Here's the perfect exercise for that. Lie flat on your back with knees bent slightly wider than your hips. If you have really fat hips, you're either going to have to really stretch your knees like in a cartoon, like The Elastic Man from India, or just skip this exercise. In fact, if you have really fat hips, just skip playing golf, nobody wants to see you out on the course.
Now, you slim-hipped people reach your hands to the ceiling like you're crying out for the Lord Jesus Christ to spare you from your miserable existence. You can hold light hand-weights, or not. What do I care? Lift your head and chest toward the ceiling and rotate to reach both hands just outside of your fat, right knee. Repeat on the left side. Now, take a breather. Ask Christ for forgiveness.
• Breathing exercises: Breathing properly and deeply is critical, especially for those tense moments on the course when normally you would start crying.
This deep-breathing exercise involves attending your local adult movie house, or calling up one of those sites on your Internet browser. Follow your instincts. It's either that or follow mine, and then you're looking at jail time.
• Horizontal abduction/adduction: I can't give you much help here, because I always get "horizontal" confused with "vertical," and I have no idea what adduction is. Who came up with that word, anyway? It's a stupid word and should be eliminated from the English language, if it's even English.
• Standing hip rotation: Don't do this. It makes you look like a girl.
• Alcohol fitness: How many times have you lost $2 Nassaus because while you were getting hamboned, your playing partners were just holding up that bottle of Jack Black pretending to drink?
Well, no need to waste good liquor. You can still drink and maintain your competitive edge. You just need to build up a tolerance. Stand upright in a dark closet, with a wide stance, and suck it down. Keep drinking until your wife leaves you.
• Aerobics: Ha! Don't make me laugh. This is golf!
• Putting: Don't bother to practice putting. Putting in golf is overrated. I play golf maybe 200 times a year and I've yet to meet anyone who can putt. You either make it or you don't. If you miss, just keep putting until the ball goes in the hole. Simple.
• Seniors: As we age, our bodies react differently, so seniors must prepare for golf differently than young punks. An important thing to remember is that there is an inverse relationship of increased ear hair to laughably short drives off the tee.
So keep those ear hairs trim and neat. If you're proud of your thick mane of ear hair, don't sweat it. If you're short off the tee, you're probably small in other areas, and I think you know what I'm talking about.
• Excuses: A healthy psychological outlook is a must for Better Golf. If you can convince yourself that the snap hook you hit into the weeds over there is not your doing at all, you'll retain the confidence needed to excel in the game.
The first time you smack one of your all-too-typical lousy shots, turn to your playing partner and snarl," "Will you stop that!" Look at him, looking all hurt and everything. Who would have thought golf fitness could be so much fun?
• Torque development in the downswing: This is so important, I can barely contain myself. This is vital to any golfer who has ever wanted to improve his score. You could even say it is absolutely critical in terms of reaching your full potential as a golfer and knowing what it is to be truly human.
• Alignment and posture: Face the target squarely and stand erect, with your rump jutting out slightly. Feels a little silly, doesn't it? Can you think of another situation in life where you would position yourself in such an odd manner? I can't.
Monday, April 14, 2008
Valley Landing Golf Course
The name came after the city conducted a contest to name the course. Dwight Crow, general manager of the course, explained.
This part of Lawrence County is known as the valley, with the south part of the county known as the mountain. Also this part of north Alabama is known as the Tennessee Valley.
The landing part comes from the airstrip located to the rear of the property. Crop dusters to Lear jets from the the nearby Lockheed Martin facility use this landing strip and thus the name: Valley Landing.
The idea for the golf course started as an item of discussion with the mayor and town council approximately three years ago, Crow said. The back nine is next to an industrial park. The idea was to maybe attract industry and bring traffic out this way. The project was officially approved in April 1999 and work started in June 1999. It took two years to come to fruition.
John Millhouse of Strategic Golf Design designed the course. His company is based in California, but he has some Alabama connections with his family living in Birmingham and he attended Auburn University.
Value for money is paramount at Valley Landing. Most of their play comes from the Shoals area of Northwest Alabama, as well as some from Decatur and surrounding towns. It costs $26 to play in the week, $3 more on weekends. This includes cart, but the flat terrain is very walkable so many people will choose this option. The clubhouse is very functional and a good size, with the driving range conveniently located immediately to the rear of the clubhouse.
The course features tift dwarf bermuda greens, some of which have quite a bit of roll. At 6910 yards from the back tees, it has plenty of length.
Talk about a tale of two nines. The front nine was built on an old cotton farm and is flat and has few distinguishing features. Several man-made ponds provide hazards to be avoided, but you should be able to score quite well on this side, which is also 170 yards shorter than the far more challenging and much more picturesque back nine.
Onto the golf course. An interesting touch is that Nos. 1 and 8 share a double green. The two greens are joined together by a narrow strip of green making for a huge overall surface. The first is a gentle opener, providing a good birdie opportunity.
On the fifth hole you have be more attentive as a crescent-shaped pond cuts into the fairway, particularly near the green on this short par 4. Definitely favor the right half of the fairway here to leave a short iron second to a sloping green.
The sixth provides quite a different look as a huge waste area stretches down the right side of this longer par 4. From the back tee it is hard to determine how much of this waste area to cut off with your tee shot, so aim a little bit more to the left than you might think. From the forward tee the hole plays straighter and thus there is no need to play over the waste area.
No. 8 is a driveable par 4 with a big blow, but look out for the water hazard to the left of the green. It comes even more into play as the lay of the land slopes towards it and it is particularly tricky as it is not entirely visible from the tee. Raised bunkers guard the right half of the fairway, so if you can't fly the ball a long distance in the air just lay up leaving a short second.
Somewhat unusually the nine ends with a par 3. It will be a mid-iron for most players to a large green with a bunker front right. The nine has looped back adjacent to No. 1 tee and you will head back toward the clubhouse and the 10th tee. Immediately it is like you have been transported to a different golf course altogether. Five of the six lowest handicap holes are found on this side, with Nos. 10 and 11 ranked the first and third hardest holes right out of the box.
The tee shot on No. 10 will instantly get your attention. Having played a front nine where accuracy is not terribly important this hole seems even more confining. It has everything a good golf hole should making you think before you swing. Tree-lined, a pond left of the fairway and green, and multiple bunkers make for a challenging par.
Immediately following is the longest par 4 on the course. Without a doubt, the hardest hole out there, No. 11 measures 455 yards from all the way back and demands a long and straight tee shot to have the chance to reach the green in two shots. Tree-lined just like its predecessor, a creek crosses the fairway but this is out off range from the tee. A stern test, you will be delighted to leave this hole with a par.
The good run of holes continues with the par 3 twelfth. Again you will have to think here as water is in play for any ball pulled a little left. Only 150 yards, it will nonetheless claim some victims, especially if the flag is back left bringing the water more and more into play. The small green is angled away from the tee, making it appear to be an even smaller target.
No. 13 is a true three-shot par 5 - being just a shade under 600 yards will see to that. Two well played shots should leave you a short iron third to this beautifully framed green complex, with hardwoods providing a pleasant backdrop beyond the putting surface.
A steady run of holes, played for the most part between mature trees on either side, continues until you reach the final hole.
Quick question. What do most golfers fear above all else on a closing hole? Water to the right, is what I would say as the vast majority of players slice the ball. Well there's water aplenty on No. 18, only a mid-length par 4, but packed with trouble. A water hazard runs down the entire right side of the hole, so the way to play this finisher is to take the water out of play by aiming well left, leaving a second shot across the corner of the water, with also a large bunker left of the large putting surface. Par here will win more bets than it loses, that's for sure.
Valley Landing is what it is - a golf course that won't break the bank for you to play. Fire away on the front nine, respect the much tougher holes on the back nine, and you should post a respectable score. And we all know, there's nothing wrong with that.
Technorati Profile
Immelman’s Steely Nerves Win Masters
There is another quality Immelman shares with Hogan that until Sunday at Augusta National Golf Club probably had not received enough attention.
Hogan, also a Masters Champion, was recognized as golf's Wee Ice Mon for his steely nerves. Immelman demonstrated over 72 holes at Augusta National that he has the same kind of determination and cool demeanor.
Immelman shot a final-round 75 Sunday for a 280 total, eight-under-par, and a three-shot victory over four-time Champion Tiger Woods. It is the highest final round score by a winner since Arnold Palmer shot 75 in 1962.
Immelman made it look easy at times, but everybody knows winning the Masters certainly is anything but. He showed resolve and perseverance at every turn. When he needed to hit a key shot or make a clutch putt to ward off challengers, he did. It was quite a display of golf.
Immelman underwent surgery last December 18 to remove a non-cancerous tumor lodged beneath his ribs. He didn't touch a golf club for six weeks and then only was allowed to hit a few pitches and chips.
Now, less than four months later, he is at the pinnacle.
"I made a pretty fast recovery, got back out on tour eager to play, but my game wasn't quite there," he said. "I wasn't happy with the way I was playing. I felt I had to start from zero again. Here I am after missing the cut last week Masters Champion. It's the craziest thing I've ever heard of."
Immelman knew the conditions would be difficult, with a blowing, swirling wind.
"It was a tough day out there," Immelman said. "I knew it was going to be tough out there for us and I knew I had to stick to my game plan, play one shot at a time, and just be tough. I'm proud of myself for doing that.
"This has been the ultimate roller coaster ride and I hate roller coasters."
Two American challengers with six Masters titles between them - Tiger Woods and Phil Mickelson - were poised to challenge Immelman but came up short.
They shot even-par 72 in the final round. Woods was runner-up by three shots; Mickelson finished at 286, six strokes behind the winner.
"I just didn't quite have it this week," Woods said. "I didn't make the putts I needed to make this entire week."
Mickelson, winner in 2004 and 2006, posted three rounds at par or better, including a second-round 68. His inability to play the par 3s with efficiency was costly. He made double-bogey and bogey the final two rounds at the 16th hole. He also had two bogeys each at the par-3 sixth and 12th holes.
"I hit two good shots today and made bogeys on four and 16, putting them in a tough spot and three-putting," Mickelson said. "Another three feet and the ball could have rolled down and I could have had a good opportunity (for birdie) both times. Some of it might have been play but some of it might have just been unfortunate."
Mickelson's most unfortunate break came at the par-5 eighth hole during Saturday's third round. His third shot hit the flagstick and caromed away. Instead of a short birdie putt, he three-putted. His charge had ended and try as he might, there was little he could do in the final round.
"I was hoping to make more of a run than I did," Mickelson said. "But it was a tough day and I felt like I had to fight pretty hard to keep it around par. But I certainly had some chances that could have brought it lower. It just doesn't look like it would have been enough anyway.
"I thought I struck the ball pretty well this week and it's encouraging that playing the majors I'm striking the ball better than probably I ever have. My chipping came around this week. It hasn't been where I wanted it."
Vartan Kupelian is the golf writer at The Detroit News.
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
ASU Women Win Southern Presidential Golf Tournament
Gonzales, LA - The Alabama State men's and women's teams continued their resurgence with strong performances at the Southern University Presidential golf tournaments.
The ASU women, led by Kyla Reay, captured the tournament championship. The men took third place.
Reay won her third tournament of the season, with a two day score of 160.
Devin Crenshaw's 151 led the ASU men. His score also earned All-Tournament honors. Todd Hutchenson and Kyle Demeester each fired 158 over the two days.
The Southern Presidential tournament was held at the Pelican Pointe Golf club in Gonzales, LA.
The teams, coached by Gary Grandison, will compete in the SWAC championships on April 20-22.
WOMEN
1st Alabama State 755
2nd Texas Southern 787
3rd Southern 912
Prairie View 969
Mississippi Valley 1079
MEN
1st Jackson State University 612
2nd Texas Southern University 622
3rd Alabama State University 630
Alabama A&M University 662
Southern University 675
Arkansas-Pine Bluff 689
Alcorn State University 704
Mississippi Valley State University 717WELCOME TO ALABAMA GOLF
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